if only you gave us a chance♥

Thursday, May 29, 2008 { 5:39 AM }

nothing much to say.
stay strong people. ;D
LOL!
Really. nothing to say.
BYE.

Labels: we are the ATFPs. united, we stand our grounds. (:

Sunday, May 25, 2008 { 4:02 AM }

With so much things in my head, is it getting too much to handle?

As much as i'd like to bottle it up, and as wei qi says, burst like a balloon when i'm filled enough, blogging is another option apart from crying my eyes out. Trust me. Its not for pity nor for sympathy. I just need somewhere to let it out. Its for me. not for you. See no evil! x_X

Family?
moving house.
I'll be moving in a week.. And the things have yet to be completely packed..
Barely packed at all, in fact..
The time constraint is killing me..
parents.
My parents are getting so stressed up,
that we have become their life size stress ball.
I don't blame them.. Their really stressed..
I'm actually really really worried for them..
grandma.
and for my grandma too..
Chances are she'll barely be living with us anymore..
no money.
how bout the financial burden?
What if it never lightens..
I plan to work with celeste darling during the hols just to lighten it a little.
A couple of hundreds could go a long long way.

Studies? My second priority.
I have to buck up.
Set my priorities right.
But why does it seem that everything is going completely wrong and out of control?
The harder i study, the worse the results.
perhaps i'm studying wrongly.
And my attention span is too narrow.
I need to concentrate.
I should study harder for the next half of the year.
I really want to get into my desired class.

Friendship problems? oh no.
with all these major problems going on, its the worst thing to be stuck in the middle.
In other words, i'm in the worst postition..
My heart really hurts to see them all like that..
Why can't they just STOP?
Like.. why hold grudges?
Everyone has two sides to them..
Why only see the bad sides and point out mistakes?
can't we see the good in them?
Stop badmouthing.
Stop being hypocrites.
Just keep your promises.
Don't betray..
Simple things like these could make such a big difference.
Its amazing how a friendship that takes years to harvest and blossom..
Can be shattered in a split second..
even if its just one nasty word used..
I love them all so much.. I only wish i could do more to help them see the tiny misunderstandings
that have led them to such big problems..
With jealousy brings anger
with anger brings hatred.
with hatred brings the end of a friendship;
All due to a tiny misunderstanding?

Teenage life? hell no.
Becoming a teen? Not much help. at all.
With mood swings and immature thinking, it only gets my blood boiling.
I must learn to control!

With that,
Here's my list of to do's and problems:
-Complete homework
-Study
-projects
-CCA
-Music
-Classes
-Tuition
-Get a job
-Remedials
-structured programme
-packing
-family probs
-friendship probs
-Councillor duties
-Cambodia trip
* i might've missed out some.

what if.. i'm the one who's brought all this upon myself? Maybe this is all my fault.. ):
This terrible, horrendous, unbelievebly nightmare-ish period of my life. T_T

why can't there be 23 hours and 59 minutes of day!
I hope i have time.
I must juggle.
and. keep the happy-go-lucky personality, right? (:
jia you, vanessa. X)
okay. I feel a little better. Gotta go back to packing later.
Then do math homework, pack bag..
And back to packing. my day ends at 11. (:
Bye!

Labels: toomuchtohandle?

Saturday, May 24, 2008 { 5:11 AM }

This morning was so screwed up..
I felt angry and upset..
Cause i overslept.
Then i got a big scolding form my parents.
And i kicked a big fuss.
Then i felt really bad..
My piano teacher is really angry at me now.

But i attended cell group at JC's house. (:
It was reaaalllyy fun.
So thank you Shayne*, jordan*, Winnie*, Xuan Jie, Gerrard, Wye kiet ( i have no idea how you spell it. =X), de hui, Judia, Vanessa, Susan. (:
They cheered me up loads. esp the ones with *.
Hahaha.
Jordan was like taking a tune and putting random lyrics to it about what he wanted to eat for dinner. =_=
So funny. (:
Shayne was also trying to play the guitar but... okay. no comment. HAHA.
Jordan went out of tune so many times while attempting to sing some songs. AHAHAHA. lol.
Then they went for dinner at central and i went home. (:

Today's cellgroup helped alot.
And i really felt the prescence of God.
it actually felt really really good.
Like. it gave me strength and courage to overcome what i'm going through.. (:
Anyways, i still need time to consider my religion.
I don't have the time to commit and attend service and stuff. =/

##confusion.akiller.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008 { 5:45 AM }

So busy today la. (:
But then again.
lol.
anyways. we had D&T today and Mr Chan let us do some burning plastic thingy.
Me and hui yi wanted to do one for each other, but didn't in the end,
looking at how difficult it was to make one.
So we helped michael. :D
haaha.
Aft school we had drama. i only stayed till 4.
Then i escaped by going to councillor games room duty. :D

Tuesday, May 20, 2008 { 5:57 AM }

MUTTON MAN BY jeogena koh

do you know the mutton man
the mutton man
the mutton man..
Do you know the mutton man
who lives
down
mutton road. :D

stupid right he. its supposed to be.. MUFFIN MAN. =_=

Anyways, moving in two weeks.
My parents are getting stressed out.
They'll probably vent it on me and my sister..
But its okay. (: Like. Its not really they're fault.

Ytd went cycling with hh, michael, okk, beloved bro, jordan, donnie, zhang min, li xuan, celeste, laura, marilyn and shirley. (:
Then he han lost his iriver.. :( We'll buy you a new one. (:
tried to teach laura how to cycle.. But for now, unsuccessful. :( Jia you!
Haha. then i wanna thank michael. (: For waiting for me and training me. It helped loads, even though it was rather tiring. THANK YOU! (: he was really nice.
And the girls. We had soo much fun. :D

It doesn't feel like much of a holiday yet.. we still have a week and a half!
Time has been passing so slowly lately.
~~I would cry myself to sleep~~
if i knew you were no longer there..
The longer it drags the uneasier i feel..
& the faster my heart beats.
through you i've learned to trust, forgive and forget..
Or is that just the strong face i put on..
there's infuriating pain and deep jealousy..
but I'll be by you till the end..
after all..
Every exit to the end is the opening door to a new beginning.
ily. (:

Saturday, May 17, 2008 { 12:43 AM }

I agree with he han, alot of people have changed. And i miss 1/9. Except for the crying festivals. That was so classic. SO COOL. :D

Anyways, I've gotta start packing.. Leaving at the end of may. I'll be really sad la. To move.
I'll miss the place and the people.. Goodbye waking up at 6. hello to 5. T_T

wahoo. i don't know why i did that. XD Anyways,
monday going cycling. woopee! :D
and i owe someone something. XD
haha. Anyways,i'm nv going to double bike with a guy EVER again.
Haha. Yeap. I'm so bored. rotting.
Talking to senior now. ((: So cool. haha.

Nowadays getting to knw more and more seniors. I'll be so sad when they leave.. :(
Don't feel like blogging. another day lor.

~~i'm sorry i treated you that way..~~
I honestly didn't mean to..
I really love you. and you alone.
i didn't mean to hurt you.
but i didn't even know what was wrong and i was hurt too.
Anyways, i'm really sorry. and its my fault. (:
I promise it won't happen again..
I'm so scared to lose you.
And so afraid there'll be a dajavu..
What if history repeats itself?
Then it'll be the end..
~~ily.~~

Friday, May 16, 2008 { 9:03 AM }

From jordan and celeste. Thanks. :D Haha.

Me and my fam went to seoul garden!! (:

Aww. My mini bday cake. Love them loads. I made three wishes. :D

Now.. Its gone. T_T ):

Li xuan and yu shan. So cute right. Notice CHIP? HAHA. XD

Teehee. I loveeee tatty. (: Thanksies.. ily. X)

I loveee jaime and yu shan. Although its not SK jewellery, its really nice. XD

Saii gave me this onion head! :D

Thanks, tsz ho di for the really cute cookie monster. I love it. (:

CHIPPPP!! :D:D:D From the councillors. I love them so much. (:

{ 2:47 AM }

Its that time of the year again! Haha.
I can't believe i'm 14.
It was awesome..
I'm really touched that so many people celebrated and remembered my bday.
And I wanna thank all of them. (:
so here goes. haha. Thanks to: All the councillors, ex councillors, nadia, maliah, nisa, syafiqah, celeste, marilyn, laura, saiisaii, li xuan, charmaine, yu shan, jaime, zhangmin baobei, rachel bubu, hui yi darling, darryl, brandon, donnie, spencie, hehan(: , michael, jordan, clavis too. Haha. And everyone else who wished me happy birthday. I'm sorry if i missed anyone out. (:

Thank you guys for all the presents. I'll post pictures of them next time.. I love you all loads.. Thanks for spending this uber special 14th birthday with me. (:
I think it was really exactly what i needed after all the problems i've been having lately.. (:

I also wanna thank my family cause they brought me out to seoul garden for dinner.
I got $100 for bday, which is aloott. (:
And the haagen daaz "cake" hahaha. Which tasted SINFULLY GOOODD. (:
Love you loads.

and one more thing.. T_T

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY SISTER MELISSA.
HAPPY BIRHTDAY TO MY SISTER MELISSA..
HAPPY BIRTHDAAYYYY TO MY SIISSTTEERRR...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOOOOO US. xD

I love you loads, although i may not always show it. Thanks for everything. (: I love you! <3

wahaha. see? i'm so nice. >=) *grins*

THANKS JAIME! :D HAHA.

Thursday, May 8, 2008 { 7:23 AM }

Hey everyone~~
haha. Woots! tomorrow is like. YAY! Last day of exams.
I find that this year's mid year examinations were pretty difficult.
I'm so scared i won't fare well.
I have that really bad feeling.
These few days haven;t been the best for me.
And especially hard on my family.

Its confirmed! I'm moving to hougang in June. :(
anyways, I'll be 14 in exactly one week.
I feel like such a. hao-lian-er to be telling everyone that. T_T
Please, don't take it in the wrong way. (:
I don't want a bash for my birthday, i def don't need presents!
I just wanna spend my birthday with the peeps listed on the wishlist. :D
Haha. The wishlist? its for fun, honestly. I don't really want anything in particvular. (:
But i'm really touched alot of peeps rmb my bday, though. (: thanks.
Anyways. Not my point. Haha. (:
Ehub is pretty cool. But not so much a hangout for us.
Cause firstly, no library. No fast food places.
Its more for entertainment.
haha. The ferris wheel is kinda really stupid, but it looks amusing. XD
(: I've been stuck on so many english songs lately.
They're like soooo sweet. :D
And I wanna start a band. but then. What can I do. =_=
hahaha. And where on earth am i gonna find the people. hahaha.
I'll think about it, though. seems cool. XDXD
(: Good luuck to everyone upon recieving your results. (:

I really like this quote. Its oober cool. (:
"never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game"
Be brave people. ((:

love you all loads. (:

Tonight i'm falling and i cn't get up
I need your loving hands
To come and pick me up
& every night i miss you
I can just look up
I know the stars are holding you..
Holding you..
Holding you..
holding you tonight..

Labels: did i tell you that i love you.. tonight..

Wednesday, May 7, 2008 { 1:34 AM }

Heyy.. (:
so cool. i met ms ong at the busstop today!
haha. Shes so nice. I'm gonna work extra hard on math. XDXD

So sad today. ):

Labels: please.don'tgo. ):

Sunday, May 4, 2008 { 3:03 AM }

Today was terrible.
Haha. I woke up at 10 (slept at 3 ytd)
And was soo sleepy. and still am!
I went for gz class.3 hours!!
RAWR.
Ytd was fun.
I went for tuition in the morning, had guzheng after that and then cell group.
I was tired out. At night, i had a dinner with my family.
But it was a well spent day.

That leaves the other half left of today.
This means i have to study. Man.
I hate exmas.
and weekends too. ):
Now i'm doing math. :D

I really hope i can do well for my mids..
If i don't, i am soo going to cry. Like so bad. seriously. :'(

Labels: milomakesmewanttopoopy :D